How to leverage being an introvert.

Jul. 13

I've always dreaded parties, going out with friends, going to the movies, gatherings, birthdays—basically everything that involves a large group of people and a lot of socialization.

I'm not shy, timid, or socially awkward. I'm just very introverted. For a long time, I thought I wasn't normal because I didn't enjoy going out, partying, and doing everything youngsters do, you know?

Eventually, I realized that it just wasn't for me. Social settings drain too much of my energy.

And if this sounds familiar … we're probably in the same introverted boat.

Your social battery is slim, and social interactions are draining. You're more sensitive to stimulation and often deep in your thought.

The problem is: the world is designed for extroverts. It's a war for attention, and the spotlight usually goes to those who shout the loudest.

It's a big challenge to thrive as an introvert in an extrovert-dominated, high-stimulation world. But you already know that.

At some point, you might have felt that being an introvert is a flaw and that you need to be more like 'other people.' - more extraverted.

Don’t.

Because as an introvert, you have a valuable skill set because of your personality.

Your ability to focus deeply, think critically, and reflect enables you to be creative, find solutions, and create value.

In this world, creating value means personal fulfillment, money, success, opportunities, you name it…

That's if you learn to channel your energy and manage your social interactions efficiently.

And that's exactly what this article is about: giving you practical steps on how to leverage your introverted personality to win at life.

Everything starts with the body

As an introvert, you spend a lot of time in your mind. This can be both a superpower and a curse, depending on how well you control it.

The main issue is that many introverts struggle to manage their thoughts. They often face constant avalanches of thoughts.

Leading to overthinking, procrastination, repetitive negative thoughts, and anxiety …

I used to desperately wish for an 'off button' to pause my mind and take a mental break.

Good new, I found one and it works wonder and If you just buy my program for $$$. Just kidding.

Your 'off button' is exercise. Specifically, weightlifting is the best tool to switch off your thinking and reconnect with your body.

Biologically, introverts often have a thicker prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for complex thinking. Now you may be thinking that you have a bigger brain and that’s great

yeah … but it comes at a cost.

This means you're more prone to deep thinking and reflection, but it also means you can easily get stuck in your own mind, losing focus on your body and physical sensations and the ‘outside’ world.

You might be thinking, "Exercise isn’t for me. I tried it, and it didn’t work out." Trust me, as an introvert, exercise is for you. You simply didn’t give it enough space or time.

At first I hate it too but there’s a big difference between not liking something and not being at it yet.

To me, and I’ve been confirming my theory with my coaching clients, Hypertrophy (working out for muscle growth specifically) and emphasis on learning mind muscle connection is the best way to channel an introverted mind into his body.

The gym isn't just about becoming a ferocious bodybuilder. It's about learning to use your body into space and pushing yourself a little more each time.

More importantly, this practice forces you to reconnect with your body. You must focus on using specific muscles and mastering good technique to lift weights.

You might be skeptical, but I assure you this is a cheat code that helps regulate overthinking and procrastination.

Now the benefits are even better because, if done properly, lifting weights and focusing on hypertrophy will not only help with focusing your mind but obviously shaping your physique, improve health, mental health, mood, lifespan…

Making physical practice a habit will help you disconnect from your mind and reconnect with your body.

Over time, you’ll notice that your mind becomes lighter, more organized, and sharper at everything it does.

In my opinion, physical exercise, especially the gym, is non-negotiable for introverts who seek to become the best version of themselves.

Learning to focus on the one thing

Because you're designed for deep thinking, you're prone to get caught in mental loops and distractions.

Whether it's at school, work, or in daily life, your mind will be your biggest distraction, constantly projecting mental scenarios that keep looping.

To leverage your tendency to think complexly, you have to learn how to channel your thinking.

The first thing is to build an optimal focus space for yourself.

Introverts are highly sensitive to stimulation. Neurologically, the theory is that your brain is more sensitive to dopamine than that of extroverts.

And if a little activation is good, too much quickly becomes overwhelming.

This is why you probably don't feel comfortable in an open office with people talking on the phone, the sound of the elevator, and Cathy from accounting chewing her gum out loud for the world to hear her gum bubbles.

Your brain functions way better on acetylcholine, which is a fancy word for saying a calm but very focused state.

All of this science geek stuff to tell you that you want to reduce or even eliminate the number of distractions around you when you want to do deep work.

You need to find your conditions for optimal concentration, for me these are the guidelines but you have to find what works for you.

Deep work protocol :

Close the door.
Put your phone in another room.
Disable email notifications.
Use noise-canceling headphones.
A list of clear tasks
two to three hours of focused work session

Whether your goal is to succeed in school, build a business, or improve at your job, you'll need to learn how to focus on one thing at a time.

Introverts can easily feel overwhelmed, so it may be harder for you than for others. But once you master it, you'll become superhuman.

Cultivating the skill of focusing on one task will let you leverage your deep thinking capacity.

Also, find and leverage the tasks you're best at. For example, I know I'm good at planning, building mental models, and condensing knowledge.

I’m not good in group settings, non creative tasks or everything that involves some sort of sitting at a desk for more than three hours.

Learn how to cultivate your strong points and you’ll soon increase the gap between you and others.

How to navigate your social environments

Being an introvert doesn't mean you dislike social interactions or are destined to be bad at them.

However, they tend to cost you a lot of energy, whereas extroverts, gain energy from social interactions.

Since social interactions drain your energy, you may have fewer of them, resulting in less social practice.

Coupled with a predisposition to feel overwhelmed in highly stimulating settings, this is the perfect recipe for social anxiety.

First, you need to know your stimulation limit. If loud music, drunk people, and flashing lights are overwhelming, maybe going out to the club isn’t the best idea. (and that’s me talking to myself here…)

You have a stimulation threshold, and exceeding it will trigger anxiety. While a little anxiety can be useful, too much will deplete your energy and willpower.

I wrote a whole article about willpower depletion you can check it out here

Another thing to watch out for is peer pressure. With less social skills and self-confidence in social settings, you might be more easily influenced.

Here's your toolkit to navigate your social environment and not for social traps :

Go to the gym

This is extremely beneficial, especially for introverts. The gym is a social environment where everyone’s focused on their own thing.

This allows you to make connections, shape your body, and channel your mind into your body.

All of that while exposing you to social contacts.

It’ll force you to take a break from your mind, work on social skills, and boost self-confidence while improving long-term health and quality of life.

If there’s a life hack for introverts, this is it. I guarantee it.

Pay more attention to people

People, especially extroverts, will tell you everything you need to know verbally and non-verbally.

Truly listen to what they’re saying, pay attention to their words and the meaning behind them. The explicit message is not always the most important thing.

This will give your brain the cues it needs to navigate social interactions.

Focus on one-on-one interactions to avoid overstimulation from too many social cues.

That’s the precise reason why I only do one-on-one coaching by the way.

If you have a hard time socializing, it’s important that you work on developing the skills to do so. Make it a daily exercise, make it intentional.

Don’t get fixated on inner sensations

If you feel socially anxious and uneasy, you need to learn to switch your mental focus.

If you keep narrowing your attention onto you elevated heart rate when you step in the locker room, this is going to worsen it.

Instead change the focus point of your attention, stop focusing heavily on yourself and pay attention to what’s around you.

Building the mind-muscle connection in the gym will help a lot with being able to relocate your focus.

Again, cheat code.

Optimize your recovery

Knowing your stimulation tolerance helps prevent depletion of energy, attention, and self-control.

After reaching your social limit, you need to rest physically and mentally to return to baseline.

Now if you’re very introverted, like yours truly, it doesn’t take you much to have your load of social interactions for the day.

You want to optimize your recovery by using what I call ‘useful’ distractions

Reading, watching documentaries or listening to podcasts is what works for me. Focus on long form quality content but find what works for you.

I highly suggest staying away from the scrolling and the empty social media content because it’s too ‘fast distractions’ - It’ll be counterproductive.

You need something that calms your brain not stimulate it even more.

Let me know what you thought of the video in the comment, what you’d like to see as a future subject

as always I hope this helps, trust the process.

References

The Surprising Benefits of Being an Introvert - Bryan Walsh